It is raining here today. It is raining here almost everyday, nowadays. Due to the climate change we must prepare fore more rain, the experts say. Around the Mediterranean, though, there will be less rain. The Sahara dessert will expand north to Greece, Italy and France.

I feel a weird bodily irritation today. I don’t know what's going on.

Is it not possible that some people just pretend to be awakened like many religious people just pretend to be religious? What does it mean to wake up? What does it mean to be religious? What does it mean to pretend to be religious?
George W Bush is a deeply religious man. He is impressed by Dalai Lama. He feels that Dalai Lama is a truly religious man, like himself. Silvio Berlusconi in Italy is also a deeply religious man and he models his life after Jesus Christ. How is all this possible? One of the richest men in Europe believes that he is modeling his life after Jesus Christ and the president of the United States believes that he is guided by God. If he is wrong God is wrong.

Is it not sad if someone truly believe that he has been saved , that he will live for ever and God knows what, when in reality he has been but fooled by some crazy preacher?

Don’t be judgmental about people that lie, put on shows and deceive themselves. Without their lies, shows and self-deceptions they might not have anything at all to live for.

Life is terrible. Reality is terrible. It is hard to find words to all the horrors. Not only Nazis killed little children just for the fun of it. In South America the natives where hunted for sport, like foxes. Little children are sold as prostitutes everyday, in China, in Russia, in Thailand, in India, in Kosovo. This is big business. The atrocities are endless.

So, to survive in this terrible world you have to construct a castle in the air, and you have to make yourself comfortable there, you have to come up with a good fantasy, or you will drown in all the horrors.

Any fairy tale will do, Santa Claus, the Easter rabbit, any religion, as long as it works for you, as long as you can believe in it. I have changed my mind now. It is wrong to complain about religions? I have stopped to complain about religions from now on.

I shouldn’t feel the way I feel. I shouldn’t be so damn nervous. I shouldn’t think the way I think. I shouldn't write about what I think. I shouldn’t believe the way I believe. I shouldn’t look the way I look. I need to lose weight. My nose is too big. I need to have an operation. I need to have a complete makeover. I should stop complaining. I should be more optimistic. I should be more creative, more positive, more confident. I should take a class in yoga or NLP, some kind of therapy that really works. I need to be more consistent with whatever I do. I shouldn't give up so easily. I really need to do something. I really need to realize something. I should be more grateful. I should love myself. I should be more loving. I should be more lovable. I should be more successful. I shouldn’t be so damn lazy. I should have more energy. I should pay more attention to what I eat. I should be more thoughtful. I should be more fulfilled, dynamic, forgiving, attentive… I need to find my true self. There are so many books around, so many therapies, so many PhDs. There are gurus everywhere. Answers. We have now reached a point in history when we have all the answers.The world is filled with them. We are at the end of history. This is the last dance. I should stop worrying. I should stop brooding. I should realize that there are no should s. I should relax now.

Suppose you were a man or a woman living in Germany at the end of the nineteen thirties. Suppose you had experienced some kind of awakening. Do you think that, under those circumstances, you would have had feelings of frustration, sadness or anger about what was going on around you? Or would you have experienced feelings of bliss? Will awakening always mean that you suddenly begin to love everything, as it is, because everything is in perfect divine order?

And what about today? People that wake up today, will they not also feel frustration, sadness or sorrow for how this planet has been ruined? Or would they simply jump for joy. "Hurray! I’m awake! I’m saved!"

What does it mean to wake up? Different people seem to mean different things when they talk about “waking up.” It is the same thing with the religions. Since the beginnings of Christianity, historians say, about 22, 000 different interpretations has developed. Think of it, 22, 000 different interpretations of the same book. Catholics, Mormons, Pentecostals, Seventh Day Adventists, Jehovah’s Witnesses…

I have definitely not experienced the kind of awakening Eckhart Tolle talks about, when the mind suddenly is filled with a lasting peace, but I am listening carefully to what he has to say. He is not an bullshitter, I think. I am listening to you also. What are we experiencing? Is it something similar as Eckhart? I still have an endlessly babbling inner voice, though, but nowadays I don’t care too much about what it has to say, and I still get carried away by stupid emotions, though not as intense as when I was younger, I can experience moments of peace but it doesn’t last very long. Is it possible to extend those moments?

In Indian spirituality the aim is often to rid oneself of all emotions. Fear, sadness, melancholy, worry, jealousy and anger are considered disturbances. An enlightened spiritual teacher has successfully deleted those programs from his mind. This path is not my path. I think that some sadness is healthy and some sadness is idiotic, some fear is good and some fear is bad, some jealousy is completely understandable and some is not. So how can one come to know which is which?
Animals also experience fear, anger and sadness. Those emotions must have some kind of biological source. But to wake up to what is, as I see it, must also involve an acceptance of the mind as it is, and how it functions.

So what about the delusions? If you accept the mind as it is, why don’t you accept the delusions? Isn’t delusions also something that makes us human? Why can’t you accept that some people turn themselves into Nazis or Neo Liberals or Muslim fundamentalists?
Well, Nazism, fundamentalist Islam and neo liberalism are mind constructions. Buddhism, Christianity and Psychotherapy are also mind constructions. Mind constructions are like castles in the air, fantasies. Fear, sadness and anger on the other hand is biological mechanisms, like digestion or the immune response.

Thoughts are also something one has to accept, I think, as long as we are able to question their contents. Thoughts has also a biological source. They have survived in the biological evolution because they proved to be useful. They made it possible for us to make up plans and strategies for how to survive in this or that hostile surrounding. So don’t try to rid yourself of thoughts, but learn to see them for what they are. Almost nothing, really, weak electric currents in the head that are sometimes useful.

To sum up, this is how I look at things: Don’t try to rid yourself of fear, or jealousy, or anger or thoughts. To me waking up is to be aware of these things. However, try to get rid of your definitions. They are completely useless. I am a Christian, I am a liberal, I am a neo conservative, I am a socialist, I am an idiot...

“How smart I am, when I think of it. How clever I am. I am awakened. I am enlightened. After all these years and years of esoteric studies I have finally reached this incredible high level. I am superior. I am fantastic. I am a God. Bow before me so I can bless you.” This is what I think of as an serious mind problem. And those who bow before such guys has even worse problems. The blind is leading the blind.

But how can we explain the synchronicities? And how do we explain Pim van Lommels findings that people seem to perceive things when the brain clearly has stopped to function? And how can we explain the dreams that seem to tell us something? How can we explain the dream world at all? How can we explain anything, the self, the mind, the body, all the billions and billions of chemical reactions that happen every second? What is life about? How come it all started? Isn’t it strange? Everything? Really!

All people have some kind of philosophy of life, or rather a number of philosophies, that direct their actions, something like software programs in a computer. The question is where all these programs are coming from and if they are all useful.

A computer without software is of course not of much use, but it also needs someone who sits there and presses the buttons, someone who make use of it. Well, it should be easy to construct a computer software that start up the computer in the morning and let it do some meaningless calculations during the day and then shut it down at night, at a certain time, but what would be the point with that?

Anyway, we all have philosophies of life, programs that direct our actions. One person, for example, can be deeply convinced that nothing is important but to make it in this world, no matter what. Another person may feel that career is not that important. Maybe he feels that it is more important to have as much fun as possible. A man may think that nothing matters but to do his duty. He can willingly risk his life in an unjust and completely meaningless war or engage himself fully in some deeply unethical activities, only because someone tells him to.

There are many different philosophies of life on the market. Some of them are useful, some of them are meant to cover hidden agendas. Some people cover their true career strategies behind clouds of religion or new age mumbo jumbo and some people are not even aware what kind of programs they have in their computer.

If I can’t change my dog how can I expect others to change their’s?

It is possible, though, to teach old dogs new tricks. We have good dog trainers here in this country and they get good results with intensive training programs.

But who or what is trying to teach the brain something new? And what new tricks do the brain have to learn? Should she behave more like a Buddhist monk or a Hindu Yogi, or maybe more like a successful, wonderful host on a TV talk show? Wouldn't that make your life easier if you were more like you ought to be?

What kind of dog do you have, a Yorkshire terrier, a poodle, a German Sheppard?

Be yourself! they tell us, the rock stars and the self improvement gurus. Many of them lie. They pretend that they are themselves, but in reality they put on a show, they act. Well, let them pretend , let them act. That’s their job, and they are so much better paid than I am?

What can we do? It is almost impossible for us to meet in the physical world. What can we do but write and have our endless talks over the phone? What would we do if we didn’t have words. Words are pretty important. Also fantasies, dreams and jokes are important. The world we live in is truly a terrible place. Most people in the world experience almost no happiness at all. It is just an endless struggle to survive. AIDS, starvation, exploitation, trafficking, war, poverty, drug problems… How could we live in this world without fantasies. Maybe the religions serve a purpose after all.

In Christian mythology Mary did not became pregnant the natural way. There is a Father God but no Mother God. Isn’t that interesting? How could there be a father if there is no mother?

*

This is elementary: We can only perceive a small, small fraction of the totality. We are like frogs in a well, totally unaware of the nearby lake, as the Buddhists say. Our senses are not keen enough. Even with the best microscopes and telescopes in the world we will have a limited view. We will never know if there are many more universes out there.
So we use our imagination to make up fantasies how the world is working. Also the scientists speculate. No one knows for sure. This is not a problem as long as we don’t mix up our fantasies with how it really is.

Religions are not a problem as long as we don’t believe in them. And the stronger our beliefs are, the more trouble we will create for ourselves and to others. We might end up as wackos,fanatics or fundamentalists.

Fantasies, opinions and ideas are not a problem either, as long as we don’t take them seriously. If you think that you know who you are and what the world is like then you can be sure that you are wrong. Strong opinions will lead to trouble.

Well, suppose that you had found yourself living in Germany, in the end of the nineteen thirties, then what choice would you have had? If you had told people in your neighborhood that you didn’t’ have any strong opinions about anything. Then they for sure would have given you a hard time. The same thing is happening today in America or in Europe. If you point out to people you meet that they have got it all wrong, that they don’t know what they talk about, that their religion or strong political opinions is nothing but fantasies, then they will be very upset.

So it is better to shut up. It has always been healthier to keep the mouth shut.

*

Think of it. What if you're not the one you think you are. What if you're, in reality, someone else. Maybe the world is not at all what you think it is. Maybe the life you are living right now is all wrong. What if you are on the wrong train. What if you are completely fooled, like those who has bought shares in non existing summerhouses. This is not speculative nonsense. People has always fooled themselves.