Monday, July 14, 2008

I am,
at least, three or four, different persons. Sometimes the dark and serious one is at the driver’s seat, sometimes the bohemian. Sometimes a hard working and responsible man is driving, sometimes a nut. So, which of all these people is really me? It depends, I think. Sometimes it is the dark and serious one, sometimes it is the nut…

Most people are not aware of that they really consist of many different persons, that we all have multiple personalities. Maybe this is because only one of them have done the driving for so long. They have been lulled into the illusion that there is only one driver. However, when things changes dramatically, after a divorce for example, many people notice that someone else has taken over the wheel; or in a war situation, when ordinary family men turn into monsters.

However, not only catastrophes changes people. Alcohol, poor sleep, stress, natural mood shifts, even the full moon can turn someone into someone else. A love story or a new job can change a person completely. A depressed man with alcohol problems can turn into harmonic sheep farmer with a wonderful wife and three lovely daughters; a punk rocker can suddenly turn in to a well-dressed stockbroker. Nothing is written in stone in this world of form.

If I, in my youth, am sent to a school of economics, I can be transformed into a neo liberal fundamentalist. If I, on the other hand, happen to go to an art school, I might turn into an artsy bohemian. Or I might get saved or turn in to a Buddhist. There are many options.

No, nothing is written in stone. There is no real me, no real ego, no real driver. All of me is conditioned by circumstances, biology, family and culture.

But who is going to do the driving if there is no driver, if there is no ego? Who is going to the pub? Who is going to work? Who is deciding to not go to work? Who gives a shit?

Even though the ego is illusory, insubstantial and ghostlike it is what operates us.

Without identification there is no ego, says Eckhart, but the problem is that the identification is to such large extent unconscious, we are not aware of what is driving us. Jealousy, revenge, laziness, crazy ideas that we need a make over, that we need to become successful...

After Eckhart experienced his Awakening, he was sitting on park benches for a couple of years, living of his savings. Then he won money on a lottery ticket. He had good luck. But those who don’t have any savings to live from and who don’t win any money on their scratch tickets, what shall they do? They have to go to work, work for endless hours with stuff they don’t want to do.

But you shall do what you love to do! You shall have good luck. Luck will come to you when you are aligned to the greater source. Fantastic opportunities will line up.

To live such happy, loving and awakened life is for the rich and lucky few. They can walk barefoot along the Hawaiian beaches and pick seashells or listen to the songs of the dolphins.

However, someone has to empty the garbage bins, someone has to do the cooking in the restaurants, someone has to clean the hotel rooms. Someone has to pick the grapefruits we eat for breakfast. How shall that work be organized? Shall it be ten or twelve hour days? Shall it be extremely badly paid. There are billions of people out there who need to read more self-help books and lift themselves up by the booth straps, who need to align themselves with the greater source, who need to be more positive. What shall you do with your awakening when you are forced to work like a dog?

The world we live in is a terrible place. Men with horrible ideas have all the power.

When the American government declared war on terror they forgot that they are the greatest terrorists. In the eighties CIA armed and organized the Contras guerrilla in Nicaragua. They terrorized civilians and killed them by the thousands. The aim was to throw spanners in the works for the legally elected government. In the seventies CIA organized the coup in Chile to overthrow also a legally elected government. This happened in September 11 1973. To Chileans 9/11 has different meaning than it has to north Americans.

The list of CIA’s well-documented terrorist activities could be made very long. Now these guys are going to save us from terrorism. In the name of freedom and democracy.

Again, how come spiritually inclined people never even mention all the hypocrisy, the evil, the idiocies. Is it because they don’t care about this world? Is it because they don’t care about other people? Is it because they are filled with -`You get pie in the sky when you die´ kind of ideas or `I'm so happy and spiritual because I'm rich?´

To wake up, I think, it is important to first of all become aware of all the madness and all the mad ideas that we are surrounded by and conditioned by. If we can’t see this, if we live our life with our eyes closed, there is not much point with prayers, mindfulness meditations or positive thinking. A true spiritual path can not be a path of escapism, delusions, hypocrisy and lies.

When you can see the madness clearly and you as a consequence turn away from ideologies, religions, crazy belief systems and crazy beliefs, things begin to open up. Then you can begin to see the real beauty around you, the real mystery, the real magic.


Doreen said...

This is what I wrote a few entries back:
I think acceptance of what is, now, in this very moment, in this sphere, is not condoning violence, war, etc. "The "yes to what is" is not fighting against anything and therefore it breaks out of a cycle.

I guess, I'm "objecting to" an endless condemnation of the ego mind, which we have all been a part of, because it is like the ego mind trying to fix itself...that's never going to happen. So, we can agree that heinous acts have been perpetrated on "innocents" but some people go through a "hell" day in and day out, too. Knowing that the formless within never ends is helpful because otherwise you HAVE to kill yourself. I think it is precisely the ego mind that fears the unknown and therefore has to commit violence in many, many ways in an attempt to ward off "death." (or they meet death in the "hope" that, there, they will go to heaven) But, in truth, death never comes. It may be like a dreamless sleep, which we welcome every night. (I think I got that from Byron Katie, sort of) That peace. "Rest in Peace" Actually, once you "get" the "peace" it just continues.

The thinking mind served a purpose for awhile and then it just got madder and madder until it went completely beserk!! So we can condemn the violent acts of the past but I know we have to view them like the insanity "defense." The consequences of those actions are still being played out. And now we have a chance for a new earth. Heaven is right here, on Earth, each of us has to find it but we have helpers, like Eckhart Tolle, Byron Katie, Wayne Dyer, Arne. And it is found in the Now. Here.

Doreen said...

Can you stay positive without judgment? More like Peaceful without judgment. Can't you see that there is nothing to do about ALL the suffering but change from within, "first"? THIS IS NOT INDIFFERENCE! Compassion isn't about pity; compassion is Care. Change your condemnation into an ethic of Care.
I care about....the banana plantation workers. Describe their plight without the condemnation of EVERYTHING that has come before. Point out the need for change. Change occurs when we accept the "Way It Is" right now, right here: when we stop the hatred of ourselves.

How is it possible to care for another if you don't 1st care for yourself? The airplane oxygen mask analogy is a good one. First you put on your mask and then you put on your child's. You can't change the world through "only" condemnation. Something has to come out of it. Those who need the message the most will not change because you tell them to or you point out their "evil" ways, etc. Isn't this physics? "They" function on a different wavelength. They can't see you, let alone hear you.

But anger breeds more anger. Hatred reacts with more hatred. Indifference on every level of being destroys. On an "individual" basis, if you remain indifferent to the life You were born to live you destroy your Being. Think about the message you give a child if you think you are an idiot. Do you think they will learn that you really aren't an idiot and help you to see things differently. Don't be surprised when they start to call themselves an idiot. If you can see clearly that kids aren't idiots why can't you see that in yourself? Self-judgment starts at home and it is the root of all "evil." Which is truly "live" backward.

Let's take Noam Chomsky, for example; it would be interesting to know what effect his writing has had on changing the perpetrators. What do you think? Of course, those on his wavelength will see and agree with what he sees. You can continue to point to the indifference that feeds the needless sufferings of millions OR realize that Each person has to change and thus multiply from one. But it begins with you.

What would happen if you started to focus on those that are creating the greatest changes in the world? What would happen if you pointed to these possibilities for the banana workers, maids, garbage collectors, etc? When you continue to address those creating the problem, how can you give hope to those most effected---they continue to see only despair. Some people can, actually, clean a toilet with Love. But in the new earth the hierarchy will crumble. No on will have to clean up another's shit. You take care of your own. And those who work too long to put food on their tables will be sitting at the table and it will be our great privilege to serve them.

I read a great quote yesterday from "the Sun" magazine: "When we truly discover love, capitalism will not be possible and Marxism will not be necessary." --Will O'Brien

This is the unfolding of the New Earth.

Lao-tzu says:

"Some say that my teaching is nonsense,

Others call it lofty but impractical.

But to those who have looked inside themselves,

this nonsense makes perfect sense.

And to those who put it into practice,

this loftiness has roots that go deep."

Doreen said...

You wrote:
"After Eckhart experienced his Awakening, he was sitting on park benches for a couple of years, living off his savings. Then he won money on a lottery ticket. He had good luck. But those who don’t have any savings to live from and who don’t win any money on their scratch tickets, what shall they do? They have to go to work, work for endless hours with stuff they don’t want to do.

But you shall do what you love to do! You shall have good luck. Luck will come to you when you are aligned to the greater source. Fantastic opportunities will line up.

To live such happy, loving and awakened life is for the rich and lucky few. They can walk barefoot along the Hawaiian beaches and pick seashells or listen to the songs of the dolphins."

The example ET gives of winning on a lottery ticket may seem to you that, then, he is "all set." Haven't you ever "won" on a scratch ticket? Is winning $4 (when you have a little money in the bank) or $1000 (when you have nothing in the bank) necessarily different? Do you always, somehow, manage to get your bills paid, do you always eat when you are hungry? Do you drink a bottle of wine every few days? To you it may seem like bliss to sit on a park bench; to others, they cannot imagine it! They will say, "how boring!" "Jesus, man, get a job!" "What's wrong with you?" "Something must be wrong with him!"

Will $1000 dollars last very long in our neck of the woods? Is that luck? Should I be thrown out on the street because I have arthritis and can't work at McDonald's? Yes, it was my choice to go skiing on that day in February 1971 when I was 14 going on 15! Yes, it was my choice to marry, knowing then what I knew. I didn't know then that I would change. It was my choice to birth 2 children into this world. Should I go back and change that day in 1971 so that today I do not have arthritis, AND my kids would not exist?

We are ALL (completely) connected. All our movements, all our choices--interwoven. The fabric of our lives. ALL ONE.

I "gave up" so much to BE who I AM and gained the Universe.

Just to know that we ALL are connected, with each step we take, all in the Now, is worth the ride!!

I will never again wish my life was other that it is. (This is IT, ALL we'll ever have. And in that realization you are FREE.)

To be creating, Live Life. Don't squander it or let it pass you by or live for others in your head. Or believe in what is true for someone else.

Those who have suffered deeply, perhaps they woke up in one glorious moment. You can't take that away from them. You can't make their lives worthless. Or meaningless.

You have to surrender to pain to live. No one can "survive" in constant "pain." Physical or psychological. Think about it. But when you surrender you reside in the space between. Hawaii or Calcutta.

Doreen said...

In my waking up experience I can see that it has not been "a running away from or a running to" situation. I have a family that is not having the same awareness of consciousness as I. It is not their fault, it is the way it is. They are sometimes unhappy about it. But it is not possible to "act" as if I am still dreaming. Many around me think that I am mad or something is "wrong" with me or that I am sick. Well, yes, my body has physical "illness" but not the mental kind. Yes, I have seen my own madness as well as everyone's. Stepping out of the collective conditioning is not easy but it is also simple to do. It is the effortless endeavor I speak of. The pain does not go away, completely. One does not become numb. One recognizes more clearly the suffering in others instead of being trapped in one's own suffering. I experience emotions but they are no longer obsessive. The emotions become real for the first time. No more need to listen to others who may say you should not feel the way you do. You will just know that what you feel and experience is truth. "Eckhart [Tolle] says A New Earth is about you. 'It will change your state of consciousness or it will be meaningless.' (p. 7) How will you know if your state of consciousness is changing? There is one certain criterion by which you can measure your success in this practice: The degree of peace that you feel within." He says that peace underlies your being. Yep.

Doreen said...

I could say that my awakening process began in 1981, perhaps it has been happening my entire "life", in this body, which would be marked by 1956. In 1981 I had a brief (8 day) meeting/encounter/experience with a person that I would come to know as the catalyst for knowing my true nature. I ran away from this person, in fear, at the end of the 8 days. Years later, I would have dreams and images of this person come to me. All I knew was, he had been kind to me in a time of intense emotional chaos. I "thought" I had received something powerful from the location (like an energy vortex) but now know that our connection was/is about waking up to consciousness of Love. A memory in the cellular body of knowing who I AM. The beauty of soul connection, synchronicity, telepathy comes from grace through the Way It Is.

Doreen said...

I think the idea of multiple personalities is the opposite to what you write. "After" waking up there is no longer a personality or role that you play. Yes, you may have different functions to fulfill (mother, knitter, gazer, cleaner) but the core Being is one "thing." I no longer get that queasy feeling in the pit of my stomach that what I am doing, at any moment, is something I don't want to be doing.