I am,
at least, three or four, different persons. Sometimes the dark and serious one is at the driver’s seat, sometimes the bohemian. Sometimes a hard working and responsible man is driving, sometimes a nut. So, which of all these people is really me? It depends, I think. Sometimes it is the dark and serious one, sometimes it is the nut…
Most people are not aware of that they really consist of many different persons, that we all have multiple personalities. Maybe this is because only one of them have done the driving for so long. They have been lulled into the illusion that there is only one driver. However, when things changes dramatically, after a divorce for example, many people notice that someone else has taken over the wheel; or in a war situation, when ordinary family men turn into monsters.
However, not only catastrophes changes people. Alcohol, poor sleep, stress, natural mood shifts, even the full moon can turn someone into someone else. A love story or a new job can change a person completely. A depressed man with alcohol problems can turn into harmonic sheep farmer with a wonderful wife and three lovely daughters; a punk rocker can suddenly turn in to a well-dressed stockbroker. Nothing is written in stone in this world of form.
If I, in my youth, am sent to a school of economics, I can be transformed into a neo liberal fundamentalist. If I, on the other hand, happen to go to an art school, I might turn into an artsy bohemian. Or I might get saved or turn in to a Buddhist. There are many options.
No, nothing is written in stone. There is no real me, no real ego, no real driver. All of me is conditioned by circumstances, biology, family and culture.
But who is going to do the driving if there is no driver, if there is no ego? Who is going to the pub? Who is going to work? Who is deciding to not go to work? Who gives a shit?
Even though the ego is illusory, insubstantial and ghostlike it is what operates us.
Without identification there is no ego, says Eckhart, but the problem is that the identification is to such large extent unconscious, we are not aware of what is driving us. Jealousy, revenge, laziness, crazy ideas that we need a make over, that we need to become successful...
After Eckhart experienced his Awakening, he was sitting on park benches for a couple of years, living of his savings. Then he won money on a lottery ticket. He had good luck. But those who don’t have any savings to live from and who don’t win any money on their scratch tickets, what shall they do? They have to go to work, work for endless hours with stuff they don’t want to do.
But you shall do what you love to do! You shall have good luck. Luck will come to you when you are aligned to the greater source. Fantastic opportunities will line up.
To live such happy, loving and awakened life is for the rich and lucky few. They can walk barefoot along the Hawaiian beaches and pick seashells or listen to the songs of the dolphins.
However, someone has to empty the garbage bins, someone has to do the cooking in the restaurants, someone has to clean the hotel rooms. Someone has to pick the grapefruits we eat for breakfast. How shall that work be organized? Shall it be ten or twelve hour days? Shall it be extremely badly paid. There are billions of people out there who need to read more self-help books and lift themselves up by the booth straps, who need to align themselves with the greater source, who need to be more positive. What shall you do with your awakening when you are forced to work like a dog?
The world we live in is a terrible place. Men with horrible ideas have all the power.
When the American government declared war on terror they forgot that they are the greatest terrorists. In the eighties CIA armed and organized the Contras guerrilla in Nicaragua. They terrorized civilians and killed them by the thousands. The aim was to throw spanners in the works for the legally elected government. In the seventies CIA organized the coup in Chile to overthrow also a legally elected government. This happened in September 11 1973. To Chileans 9/11 has different meaning than it has to north Americans.
The list of CIA’s well-documented terrorist activities could be made very long. Now these guys are going to save us from terrorism. In the name of freedom and democracy.
Again, how come spiritually inclined people never even mention all the hypocrisy, the evil, the idiocies. Is it because they don’t care about this world? Is it because they don’t care about other people? Is it because they are filled with -`You get pie in the sky when you die´ kind of ideas or `I'm so happy and spiritual because I'm rich?´
To wake up, I think, it is important to first of all become aware of all the madness and all the mad ideas that we are surrounded by and conditioned by. If we can’t see this, if we live our life with our eyes closed, there is not much point with prayers, mindfulness meditations or positive thinking. A true spiritual path can not be a path of escapism, delusions, hypocrisy and lies.
When you can see the madness clearly and you as a consequence turn away from ideologies, religions, crazy belief systems and crazy beliefs, things begin to open up. Then you can begin to see the real beauty around you, the real mystery, the real magic.
